35 Comments
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Andrea Hoffmann's avatar

The fact that I understood every word is major cause for concern.

Meh, I always wanted to be bilingual though…

Really cute piece! Thanks for seeing us moms of teens.

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Of course, you did, you have Gen Z teens!

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Good Humor by CK Steefel's avatar

I had to put this essay in Google translate. Hehe.

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Chris Keller's avatar

This is so very funny. It plays like a dictionary for those of us who still think “rad” and “awesome” are appropriate adjectives. I particularly loved:

“You’ll probably make enough to even buy a back-to-school fit so you can show up in September looking all snatched!” Snatched? Never heard it but now I am dying to drop it into a convo with my nephew.

I also kinda liked the Tesla and online gaming Easter eggs. Ouch, but necessary.

Really well done.

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Thanks, Chris! And yes, your nephew will think you’re very cool now. ;)

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Alyson Mosquera Dutemple's avatar

Burst out laughing at this one, Jennifer. Gonna send to my kids with a note that says, "that's not me, right?" lol

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Thanks, Alyson. I'm sure it's not you! But if it is, you're in good company. ;)

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Brain of J-Hawk (he/him)'s avatar

Hopefully Emma can hook you up with some free Blizzards!

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

That would slay!

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Lisa Hides's avatar

At my son’s graduation, the parent council president did an entire speech in Gen z aka brain rot (?) and it was deliciously ‘cringe’.

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Wow, that is iconic!

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LiudmilaBrus1's avatar

Generation Beta teen mom: The world outside the Vault can kill you...

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Ha! Let’s hope that’s not true.

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Lee Bacon's avatar

We live in Germany and all the kids our daughters come into contact with are German. And yet our six year old has started using the word “bro” with startling regularity. You can’t escape the slang.

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

That’s funny. Where do they get it from?!

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Lee Bacon's avatar

Good question. American slang is common, even among German kindergarteners. Or maybe it’s from something they saw on tv.

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Lindsey Goldstein's avatar

Amazing. Though my head spins with my kids’ lingo!

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

It feels like it changes much faster than when we were kids.

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Lindsey Goldstein's avatar

💯

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Liz Alterman's avatar

I’m crying! 😂 this is hilarious! Sharing it with my whole family now 😂

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Aww, thanks for sharing, Liz!!

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Amanda Jaffe's avatar

Actually, this was pretty iconic! That's a good thing, right?

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Definitely.

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Timothy J Crawford's avatar

How effectively you adopted the patois!

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Lots of practice!

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Jude Jones (they/them)'s avatar

High-key PMO that I didn’t write this!

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Lindsey Smith's avatar

Bruh, this is low key perfect bruh.

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Thanks, Lindsey. My girls called it cringe.

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David Conte's avatar

I was looking forward to those bussin’ vacation selfies. Why you buggin’, Mom?

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Jennifer Haubrich's avatar

Gardening photos are ICONIC, no prob!

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Hilarious. “I have some tea I don’t want to gatekeep.” 😂

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